Monday, 29 October 2012

And we all have the "Kabhi aao" relatives

There are always 2 specific kind of relatives. And the best part is that we all have them. First are of course the ones we want to meet (TYPE 1). Others are those who dont want to meet us!(TYPE 2)

2012 turned out to be a particularly bad year for our family as we lost 2 close relatives. Their loss made the entire family get together for prayer meetings etc. Even though the over riding emotion was grief, being the observer I am, I couldn't help but notice a sort of commonality in the general interaction between people who are 'related' somehow.

Ever noticed that at weddings, funerals or other family functions there are some people who while leaving for home will say to you- "Kabhi Aao......Ghar". While "kabhi aao" is said with the head moving up and down and in a firm tone (sounding like a question), "Ghar" is said so faintly that I am assuming they say Ghar and not something else which probably means- dont come!

Be assured that here, I am not complaining or pointing fingers at anyone because if I have relatives, I am also someone's relative! Right? So I am talking about each one of us. We all have a set of people who we know are our family but there is no reason, excitement or intention to actually meet them any longer than what weddings. funerals and family functions allow. We are all courteous to remind them that "Well....since God made us a family, he automatically opened the doors of our houses to each other"- But neither do I  take it seriously, nor should you bother to do so. 

You are still wondering who these people are in your life? I dont know if I can help you fully but there are some characteristics which I have noticed in my set and may be if you apply these to your own situation, you will recognize them instantly. 

  • Firstly of course they will ALWAYS say to you- "kabhi aao" especially when they are on their way out.
  • Funnily when they met you first that evening(or day) they will complain-"Arre tum aate hi nahi kabhi humse milne!". And they do so with so much conviction that you are almost embarrassed why they aren't part of your TYPE 1 category.
  • They will huddle up with their TYPE 1 relatives and from the corner of your eye you will see them clearly discussing you.
  • They will always ask your parents about what you are doing, when will you get married, whether you are working or unemployed- But they will never ask YOU directly.
  • They will always compare your physical looks to the last time they saw you. Since 'how you look' is the only legitimate conversation they can have with you, you are bound to play along.
  • At least once in your conversation, both of you will put one finger on your chin, look up in the sky while wondering- "Kahan mile the hum last time?"

Next time someone uses the code word- 'Kabhi aao' on me- my answer will definitely be- "Quickly give me your address". I will also take out my phone pretending I am serious about noting it down. Lets see if they prove me wrong :)

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