Thursday, 18 April 2013

Ke aayi ab apni bhi baari......

Okay hold your breath for the biggest news from our fold! I remember the last two times I said this was first in 2006- to announce the seeding of my first born and then 2008- to announce that we have another baby coming along, in case you didn't wish me for the first one! But this time the news is BIGGER! It relates to our first baby- Rahul- who is set to step into matrimony at the end of this year :). The bride of the year is Nishita! I wont say much on her or she ll call me up and say- "Parul Di, mujhse pooch to lete aap! Main aapko aur mirch masala bata deti!". All I should say is that she and her family have fit into ours - like the most perfect missing link :). 

And just in case you are curious, Nishita has by-hearted my earlier post on my version of an 'Ideal dulhan' for my brother and we will be conducting a reality show like function, with her on the hot seat, where she can answer every bullet point. Await invitations ;)

So, madness beckons our household where Venue, menus, functions, their sheer scale, invitations, phone calls, sherwani shopping, ghodi booking, coordination with umpteen suppliers is already taking its toll. Oh yes- I know its still seven months away! But all of this needs discussions and re discussions so each one of us is on the same page! And the icing on the cake is that my parents- who are obviously one half of the crucial stakeholders (the other half is Nishita' parents), are located in Ahmedabad. Thankfully they have handed over the power of attorney (boon of having two lawyers in the family) to Saurabh who will now represent Papa in the court of......this wedding! So while this madness will continue even after a week of THE day, lets concentrate on the things you cannot imagine I have been thinking about!

  1. The questions- "What will I wear?", "How will we go?, "What will we gift?"-  which were so pertinent to every other wedding we attended have assumed graver meanings as they will all apply to us. Now people will wonder- "What will Parul/Rahul wear?", "Will they invite that particular relative of mine?", "Shall we ask Saurabh/Parul if we can gift this?". I wish one could marry off their younger brothers in a pair of denims!
  2. All the glittery wedding and sagai pictures you see on facebook? Now we will be in the center of those pics! Isnt it a norm to put the important people in the center and automatically stand like bent brackets around them when one is getting clicked?
  3. Till the day doesnt come, everyone we will meet will ask- before saying a Hello-"Kaisi chal rahi hain taiyariyan?". And we will all give a practiced answer : "Bas chal rahi hain"
  4. On the functions, a halo will appear on our heads which will easily indicate to our guests that we are the ones they need to ask/blame/question for running taps, missing phones and crying babies. Thankfully this being the last shaadi of our family, they are all aware that these things are NOT in our hands!!
  5. We will be checking into various Chatarpur farms, Hotels and banquets in the initial months (venue selection), then Chandi Chowk and Karol Bagh (for invitations), then South Ex and GK (for shopping), then parlors (for our own overhauling) and finally our cousins and their kids will be checking us in, on our own functions!
  6. Every conversation will begin and end with a new word that is customized for EVERY marriage. A word that will almost have a meaning by the end of it all- "RahulNishita this and that....RahulNishita here and there....."
  7. Even after months of planning we will still miss out on a lot of things which we ought to have done two months back. For all such mistakes and more- Saurabh is our excel sheet cum alarm clock cum notepad cum reminder alert cum taskmaster who will even turn back time to ensure things happen the way they should have!
  8. V and N are super excited to get a Mami home. Although they call her Nishita Didi as I am sure their Nishita Didi has secretly asked them to do so. Why else, when I have told them to call her Mami now, they insist that 'Didi' is just fine! Oh by the way, since Nevaan is an exact replica of his Rahul Mama in habits- he once mentioned that he will also get married to Nishita Didi when he grows up!
  9. At the end of it all......we wont be able to please each and everyone still. Some will complain about the date, some about the food and others about the colors of the plate. But like this post isn't perfect (see it ends with an abrupt 9 points), weddings too are supposed to be- Imperfect but fun :)

Friday, 12 April 2013

To V and N....with love :)

Rise, fall and you rise again
I stand at a distance and stare at you
my hands are unable to reach you love
but my heart beats right next to you

Write, erase and you write again
I smile at every word you ink
I dont poke you for your mistakes today
as you rewrite it before I blink

Yes, no and a yes again
I cringe as to why like this you were made
I still go by whats best for you
as I am the one you will blame

Smile, cry and you smile again
Together you are but so apart
I try my best to shape it for both
with the heart that He split in parts

Keep, lose and you find again
But I will never let them go
Whenever you need your memories together
Till I exist, they are under my pillow

 Near, far and far away
One day you will take the flight
I will then call you up baby
to ask if we did it all, right

Monday, 8 April 2013

Rejected? What the hell??

Its easy to say that one should take rejections in their stride. Trust me, its a very bitter pill. Now that I write and make submissions at a lot of places, its encouraging to get responses which are positive. But yesterday when I got a mail from someone who said- "We are afraid we will not be able to accommodate your piece this time........please keep submitting in future....this is not a comment on your style of writing........we love you but just that we do not love you right now.......". Yes, I made up this last line but the politeness with which this rejection came was so poorly disguised in encouragement, that it taught me an important lesson.

It made me ask myself as to why the hell am I not taking this in a good spirit? I know why! Because I have been loved way too much first by my parents, then by my sibling, then by Saurabh, then by his mother and latest by my sons! I haven't told any of them yet about this mail and I already know their reactions(listed below) which are my life lines, my motivations to keep making mistakes, my reasons for not accepting the fact that someone can REJECT me!!!!

  • My Dad keeps a track of what all I am doing with my new writing career. Yesterday too, he probed me on our phone call if everything was alright with me. I did not tell him about this mail. He will read about it now through this post and definitely feel as bad as I have felt and say to me : "Arre unhe aata hi nahi padhna. Tu chinta mat kar. You are a star"
  • Saurabh also isnt aware of this mail. Now when he will read this blog he will call me to know what exactly happened and why I didnt share this news with him. I can hear him say : "You cant expect everyone to like you babe. I know you are the best!"
  • Rahul is the biggest spoiler of the lot. He will read this blog post late tonight. Then he will wait for me to wake up in the morning. Then he will call me around 10 am and say: "@#%$& reject kar diya? Di you send me the story. I will bloody get it published"
  • My Mom will get to know about this from Papa. She will casually mention it in our daily call and comment : "Are you alright? Keep writing okay? If they dont understand, someone else will"

Does this mean that we should stop loving our kids, harden ourselves so we can teach them to take failure in their stride? Oh not at all! It just quietly and profoundly (is this even a word?) tells me that I should prepare V and N like this- "What you may mean to me, you may not mean to the big bad world outside- the day you decide to make them privy to your innate thoughts, beliefs and creativity. But I know that you are damn good and Mamma will always keep you insulated when others judge you". It keeps me going now and it will keep them going then too :)

Image Courtesy: